Diaries / Captain Calico Jack’s Log

Captain Calico Jack’s Log

The captain’s own account of life aboard the galleon: how clever he is, how loyal his crew are, and how on earth the prisoners keep getting out.

Fiction. Legends, reports and most of the crew are invented. The ship and the shanty are real.

10 December 2027Brisk · A Year in the OpenCalico Jack looks back on a year of strangers reading his private log, gathers every clue about his helpful traitor, and reaches a confident conclusion.
12 November 2027Squally · All presentNothing to Crawl ThroughCalico Jack wants a secret tunnel on his galleon and learns his ship was built with no crawling and no squeezing, so that any prisoner can sail. Pirates log.
8 October 2027Brisk · Beginners, EverywhereCalico Jack grumbles that first-time prisoners keep choosing his galleon as their very first escape room, and keep escaping it. A comic Pirates log entry.
19 September 2027Brisk · All presentNo Prey, No Pay, No PeaceTalk Like a Pirate Day comes round again, and Calico Jack explains the old rule of no prey, no pay to prisoners who keep leaving with his gold. Pirates log.
13 August 2027Contrary · Mostly presentLate for My Own CaptureA crew rushes in at the last minute for their Pirates voyage, and the captain lectures them on punctuality, briefings and the true length of a capture.
9 July 2027Fair · The Locker RebellionA prisoner tries to bring a talking smartwatch aboard Calico Jack’s galleon, and the captain finds he agrees with the management about something. Pirates log.
11 June 2027Becalmed · One Reader per CrewCalico Jack writes long, flowery orders all over his ship and is offended that a crew only needs one good reader to get past them. A comic Pirates log entry.
14 May 2027Suspicious · Mostly presentFog Machines Are for CowardsCalico Jack asks for real fog to hide his galleon and is told the ship has none, on purpose, so prisoners breathe easy. He sulks in his cabin. Pirates log.
9 April 2027Brisk · Under reviewThe Button I Did Not ApproveCalico Jack learns every chamber of his ship hides a button that opens the hatch for any prisoner who asks, and demands to know which carpenter put it there.
12 March 2027Becalmed · Small Pirates, Large OpinionsSchool-age prisoners board Calico Jack’s galleon and prove braver and better organised than his crew. The captain learns the age rules. A Pirates log entry.
12 February 2027Squally · Mostly presentTwo Prisoners Is Not a CrewValentine’s weekend brings couples aboard Calico Jack’s galleon two at a time, and the captain must accept that a pair can rob him just as well. Pirates log.
15 January 2027Suspicious · Do not askCharts for QueenslandCalico Jack unrolls his charts of Queensland, where his galleon is due in the first half of 2027, and plans a grand arrival in Brisbane. A Pirates log entry.
11 December 2026Suspicious · Recounted twiceA Voyage Wrapped in PaperCalico Jack learns that people give each other a night as his prisoners for Christmas, in a card with a ribbon. Baffled, then a little flattered. Pirates log.
6 November 2026Contrary · Recounted twiceA Shanty on George StreetCalico Jack learns his island shanty has opened beside his galleon in Sydney, and fears prisoners will now rob him twice in one visit. A Pirates log entry.
21 October 2026Contrary · Under reviewWho Has Been Reading My Log?Calico Jack discovers his private captain’s log has been posted for all to read, and orders the world to look away. What the log is, and what it never tells.
10 August 2026Becalmed · All presentCollins Street Takes the GalleonCalico Jack’s ship opens at Escape This Melbourne CBD on 10 August 2026, and he learns Melbourne prisoners are captured at peak or off-peak times. Log entry.
13 May 2025Fair · A Voice in My HoldCalico Jack hears a mysterious voice below deck giving his prisoners helpful hints, and blames the parrot, the wind and a ghost. Never his first mate. Log.
2 November 2024Squally · Weighing Anchor at NorthbridgeCalico Jack’s galleon leaves its old berth at Escape This Northbridge in November 2024, and the captain gets misty about all the prisoners who escaped there.
18 October 2024Suspicious · Do not askSydney Surrenders NothingCalico Jack’s galleon opens at Escape This Sydney CBD on 18 October 2024, and the very first Sydney crews sail off with his treasure. The captain is unamused.
29 March 2024Becalmed · Two Hideouts, One MallCalico Jack’s island shanty opens under the same Perth mall as his galleon, and he finds prisoners mean to rob both in one afternoon. A comic Pirates log entry.
26 January 2024Fair · New Moorings Under Hay StreetCalico Jack’s galleon takes its first prisoners at Escape This Perth CBD on 26 January 2024, and the captain defends his very narrow cabin door. Log entry.
19 September 2023Suspicious · Recounted twiceAmateurs Talking Like PiratesOn Talk Like a Pirate Day, Calico Jack finds his prisoners in costume growling ‘arr’ at him on his own ship, and takes it very personally. From his comic log.
24 December 2021Becalmed · Orders for a Holiday ShantyChristmas Eve on the galleon: Calico Jack orders a beach shanty built to hide his treasure, and puts his trusty first mate in charge. From his comic log.